Grief Is a Sneaky Bitch
Grief Is a Sneaky Bitch
An Uncensored Guide to Navigating Loss
A comprehensive and compassionate guide to navigating loss.
When social worker Lisa Keefauver became a widow in 2011, she was alarmed to discover that even though 100 percent of us experience loss, we’re living in a grief illiterate world. In her work as a therapist, and in her search for help in the wake of her own loss, Keefauver began to see how the misguided stories we consume about grief lead to unnecessary suffering. Responding to the problematic narratives that grief is something to move on from after completing the five stages like some sort of to-do list, Keefauver became a grief activist. Through this book and her hit podcast of the same title, she creates a safe place to be inside the messiness of it all, to discover the full spectrum of grief, and to find the tools that help grievers move forward, not on. Grief is a Sneaky Bitch is a comprehensive guide—both a manual full of insights and skills and, even more importantly, a thoughtful companion that helps readers feel seen and held.
Keefauver shares her personal and professional wisdom alongside the lessons she’s learned from clinicians, authors, poets, and friends. In place of rigid instructions and must-do checklists, Grief is a Sneaky Bitch invites reflection, encourages self-compassion, and explores the therapeutic power of humor with, yes, a bit of profanity.
Grief is a Sneaky Bitch is a candid, direct, and at times humorous exploration of the life-changing tides of loss. Keefauver expertly combines her clinical background and personal experiences to provide us with a compassionate and practical guide for navigating all forms of grief. Whether your loss was long ago or last week, this book will help you find your own way of living with it.
When we lose a loved one, Lisa Keefauver reminds us in Grief is a Sneaky Bitch, grief becomes a part of our story. But the good news is that it will never be our whole story. What could be more hopeful than that?
This must-read companion guide for those who are grieving has captured the heartbreak of grief with compassion, insight, and humor. Grief is a Sneaky Bitch is the book we have been missing!
Grief is a Sneaky Bitch is wise, accessible, safe, practical, and ultimately life-enhancing. Lisa's capacity to capture so many types of grief experiences, while honoring each and every one of them, astounds and comforts. This book is a true companion that each of us should always have close by.
Lisa Keefauver has done something miraculous in this book in that she has taken the griever into account. She knows that her readers will need short, easy-to-digest material while also providing them with depth, profundity, and step-by-step invitations to process grief. Grief is a Sneaky Bitch reads like a witty, truth-telling best friend mixed with the most supportive grief counselor you’ll ever meet. A beautiful companion for anyone moving through loss.
A truly helpful, honest, and important trail map for the journey we all eventually must take through grief. In easy-to-remember, sometimes funny, sometimes sad, but always truthful ways, Lisa is a superb guide.
Lisa Keefauver has crafted a warm, irreverent, and powerful guide for those of us who are either navigating grief, or supporting the bereaved. She manages the extraordinary feat of being inviting and accessible while at the same time packing in an immense amount of knowledge and science around grief and the grieving process. Grief is a Sneaky Bitch is an extraordinary, must-read companion for anyone struggling with any form of grief or loss.
Lisa Keefauver is a social worker, grief activist, and founder of Reimagining Grief. She is an adjunct professor of loss and grief at the University of Texas at Austin, an organizational consultant, and a keynote speaker (including at TEDx). In 2019, she created the popular podcast Grief is a Sneaky Bitch.
- Preface: Life Lessons Learned at the Bottom of the Ocean
- Inviting You to Start Here: Orienting You to the Who, What, Where, When, and Why of Grief
- Introduction: A Guide to Reading This Book
- Time in Grief: Discovering How and Why Time Feels So Different
- the World’s Still Spinning
- Start Close in
- the Messy Middle
- Wait. Am I Still Grieving?
- What the Hell Is Happening to Me? Helping You See the 360-Degree Impact of Grief (No, It’s Not Just All in Your Head)
- Everything Sucks (And Other Negative Thoughts)
- This Is Your Brain on Grief
- Your Body Knows
- Too Much Too Soon
- Emotions and Feelings and Moods, Oh My!
- Another Full-Time Job
- Relating to Yourself and Others (Or Not): (Re)Discovering Yourself and Your Relationship to Others in Grief
- Everyone Is Stylish in Their Own Way
- Knowing and Honoring Your Needs
- Oh, the Places You Go and the People You See (And Why It’s Exhausting)
- People Say Stupid Shit
- Who’s Got Your Back?
- of Course It’s Complicated
- Access Denied
- Pitfalls and Hazards: Identifying the Grief Thief and Other Speed Bumps to Navigating Loss
- Watch Out for the Grief Thief
- There Is No Grief GPS
- Ambiguity S-U-C-K-S
- Should Is a Dirty Word (And Not the Swearing Kind)
- Holidays, Anniversaries, and Other Grief Hazards
- Secondary Losses: The Sneakiest Bitches of Them All
- Skills and Tools That Help Grief Suck Less: Discovering Ways to Soften the Hard Edges of Grief
- Notice Mindfully
- Improv Skills Help
- Your Turn to Buddy-Breathe
- Seek a Creative Resource
- Make Space
- Now What? Bringing Curiosity to the Emerging Story of Your Life
- the Beautiful, Messy, Emerging You
- Memories for Safekeeping
- Meaning Making (Even Though It Didn’t Happen for a Reason)
- When Grief Becomes a Part of the Story—but Not the Whole
- A Little Extra
- Appendix A: An Alphabet of Reminders for Your Grief Journey
- Appendix B: A Letter to the Grief Supporters
- Afterword
- QR Codes for Guided Meditations
- About the Author
